"Produce section. Very provocative area. A lot of melons and shapes. Everyone's squeezing and smelling..."
- Jerry in The Junior Mint

"Y'know I remember when I was a kid growing up, kids would make fun of my name like you wouldn't believe - 'Jerry Jerry Dingleberry', 'Seinsmelled'..."
- Jerry in The Junior Mint

"As of today I am a proud parent of a one-mile stretch of the Arthur Berkhardt Expressway."
- Kramer in The Pothole

"Well, you're the big look expert. I wanna see how smart you are."
"Trust me, I know the look."
- Elaine and Jerry in The Wink

"It pains me to say this, but I may be getting too mature for details."
- Jerry in The Deal

"Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason."
- Jerry in The Baby Shower

"Now listen, let's keep an eye on each other tonight. In case one of us gets in a bad conversation, we should have a signal that you're in trouble so the other one can get us out of it."
"How old are you?"
- Jerry and Elaine in The Stranded

"I've always been a stall man."
- George in The Note